A wise rabbi once said, “When a person reaches an older age, as in our father, 98 years old, and they have a peaceful passing, it’s not a tragedy.” Of course, he is right, but no matter the age, there’s never enough time with the people we love.
We are celebrating a life well lived, celebrating an outstanding human being. Harvey was fortunate. Shawna said—and she’s correct—he did all of his aging in one month. He was sharp as a tack, well-read, up to date on everything. Just days before he passed, we were talking about mortgages and GICs and the real estate business!
Elise, Harvey, Corinne, Shawna, and I call ourselves “The Originals.” We even have our own chat group. At any social function, we always end up—the five of us—chatting and laughing. We see our parents usually seven days a week. There is no guilt or obligation. We spend time because we truly want to and love our parents so deeply. Our parents are fun. They always had a more exciting social calendar than the three of us combined. They’re game to do everything.
They say you should spend time with people whose faces light up when you walk in the room. Our father’s face lit up every time he saw his beloved wife, Elise, his kids, and his grandkids. Harvey’s number one priority was peace of mind…`not more things. It was always more peace.
A Harvard study states that the number one contributor to good health in the later stages of life is the quality of your relationships. Harvey was friends with everyone. Everyone called him Harvey, never Mr. Kalles.
You can search the world’s surface, and everyone you meet has the nicest things to say about Elise and Harvey Kalles. What a benefit Corinne, Shawna, and I have had as Elise and Harvey’s kids. We often say we won the parent lottery—and we did.
We played sports together my entire childhood. We played racquetball and tennis. Harvey had a unique parenting style. He never let me win so I could feel better. He never took it easy on me. Harvey’s lesson was clear… you will only win when you are better.
Harvey taught us consistency. He himself worked out seven days a week. Up until the beginning of July, he would spend four hours in the gym, in the spa, in the pool, on the recumbent bike, doing weights. He was the mayor. Everyone knew Harvey, and everyone loved spending time with him.
Harvey believed in hard work. I went to Western University, and it was my dream to play varsity tennis there. I trained for two hard months before the tryout, and then I got cut. And I did the same thing for years two and three with the same training regimen, and I got cut years two and three. Harvey just said, “Keep working.” He didn’t say, “You got a bad draw.” He didn’t say, “That is so unfair.” He didn’t say I was better than the players who made the team. He just said, “Keep working.” The lesson is to be consistent. Hard work can overcome most obstacles.
Harvey was an involved father before that was a thing. Harvey took Corinne, Shawna, and me swimming or skating to the Y every Sunday by himself. At 13, I volunteered to work with a blind child through the CNIB. Harvey came with me every Sunday for a year as I spent the day with Enrico, a boy my age who had lost his sight. Harvey spent the day with Enrico’s father, talking at their kitchen table. Their friendship grew, and later, Harvey got him a job with our uncle, Albert. Harvey never told me about his kindness. I learned about it from Enrico. That was just Harvey doing good for people. Quietly.
Saturdays were real estate days for my dad and me. He would drive by the corner of Bay and Bloor, where the Manulife Centre stands, and say, “I could have bought that corner for $13,000 50 years ago, if I had just been thinking!”
There were other lessons on these trips. He would visit with the farmers and talk about their hopes and dreams. When we drove off, Harvey would explain to me, “Michael, you see the farmers we spoke to? They are happy. They don’t drive fancy cars or live in fancy homes, but they spend their time outside and are close to their family.”
He was always so proud of us, and we, in turn, so proud of him. We had good reason. My sisters always said Harvey was the best in every role he played… father, husband, friend, business owner.
His relationship with our mom, Elise… wow. They were a power couple, not because of their achievements, but because of their partnership, their true love, and dedication to each other.
Many have said that Elise could run the country. We agree. Elise has been a superstar real estate professional for close to 50 years. Some husbands would be jealous. Elise is surrounded by the business decision-makers in Canada, working nights and weekends. Instead, Harvey was Elise’s greatest fan, encouraging Elise to get her license 50 years ago. Shawna would say that Harvey has always been the wind beneath Elise’s wings.
Harvey believed in the importance of a good name. When his beloved father, Harry, passed on, Harvey told me, “All you have that is of any importance is your reputation. Always keep your word. Always do what you said you would.”
Harvey understood balance. I think he may be the only Kalles who ever did. I remember on a Thursday, Harvey came into my office, going back maybe 20 years ago, before technology took over. He said, “You know, it’s so hard to place a mortgage. Everybody’s in the mortgage business today. It’s so tough to find a good mortgage.” The next day, I had a call from a mortgage broker. He said, “Michael, we’ve got this mortgage.” Gave me the terms—slam dunk. I called my dad in Florida. I said, “Hey Dad, great news. We got this mortgage.” I gave him the terms. He says, “Great. I’ll take it. Tell him I’ll come in and sign all the papers on Monday.” When I told him it had to be signed that day, Harvey replied, “If that’s the case, I’ll take a pass. I’m with your mother on holiday, and that’s the most important thing.”
Harvey understood business. In 1951, Harvey transitioned from fruit wholesaling to real estate. He started syndicating farmland in Mississauga. When all his partners wanted to sell, Harvey told them to stay in the deal. “In 70 years, these farms could be worth something.” They didn’t have the same time horizon, and so Harvey bought them all out and continues to hold most of those investments today.
In 1957, Harvey founded Harvey Kalles Real Estate Ltd. Twenty years later, Elise joined the sales force. For the last 30-plus years, I’ve had the privilege to learn real estate and ethics from the greatest teacher there ever was.
Harvey and I have both very strong personalities; however, we have never had a single harsh word between us. Our relationship was built on mutual respect and complete trust. Together, we built Harvey Kalles Real Estate into a truly professionally run family business. We have been so lucky to work with people we like and respect. A few weeks ago, we celebrated 53 agents and support staff who have been with our family business for 25 years or more. The greatest gift our agents gave Harvey is their incredible loyalty to Harvey Kalles Real Estate.
Harvey understood how to make sure your kids feel they are your number one priority. No matter how hard Harvey worked, no matter how busy, he always took his kids’ calls. I would paint these awful paintings in art. I had no talent whatsoever. When I went to visit Harvey at the office, each piece was framed and proudly displayed. I started typing offers, answering calls, making coffee for clients and agents, cleaning the back office. When I got my driver’s license, I would deliver the dailies and the ads, and then I started installing “For Sale” signs for the agents. Harvey wanted to eliminate entitlement immediately.
Elise, Harvey, and I spent four days at the cottage for the May long weekend. We all had the best time. When we arrived home, Harvey said, “Thank you so much.” I told my parents, family never has to say thank you. We are family. These are memories that will last a lifetime. My father never went on a boys’ trip. He either traveled with my mother or with his kids.
Harvey understood commitment and loyalty to his wife, Elise. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen or heard of a greater love in my life. Ever. A few weeks ago, Harvey leaned over to me and said, “You know, I just thought of something. I figured out what the greatest gift I’ve ever given you kids…marrying your mother and giving you the best mother in the world.”
He would tell Corinne, Shawna, and me how lucky he was to have married the woman of his dreams—the most wonderful wife in the world. I’m going to read something that I read at my grandfather’s eulogy, Harry Kalles, of blessed memory:
What defines success? He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, loved much, who has gained the respect of intelligent people and the love of little children, who has filled his niche and accomplished his task, who has left the world better than he found it, whether by a kind word, a helping hand, or a shared gift, who has never lacked appreciation for Earth’s beauty or failed to express it, whose life was an inspiration, whose memory a benediction.
This is a celebration. This is a gift. This is a privilege. This is a blessing. The essence and lessons that Harvey Kalles taught all of us will live on forever.